itstillhurt | Songerein IC Inbox

Why shouldn't you? Your dreamotion just helped me when mine couldn't!

( He places his free hand over his chest, then holds out the spear. )

You shouldn't hide away just because you might be a danger to someone some day. If that was the case, I should never have been allowed to live.

Shut up!

[She wheels on him as she snaps- in desperation, in rage, she doesn't know. She can't even tell anymore, she just can't bear the sudden clenching discomfort in her stomach anymore, the blind panic, the tension-]

I will not lose control again. I am Azula. I don't lose control. I don't make mistakes. I don't allow my hand to be forced. I don't-

[The boasts trail off after a few moments, her breathing ragged, her heart racing, and when she talks again, it's shaky, her voice harsh and uneven.]

I could have killed you.

( "I don't make mistakes?" These expectations for herself... explain a lot. But what can he possibly do about it? The guy who makes mistakes constantly? Who is one giant mistake? )

I'm not as fragile as a human. You didn't kill me.

( Sure, he could have died, maybe... But it doesn't bother him right now. Not even with his leg as bad as it is. But... what else can he say? He doesn't know. He has to think on it. )

[There's a flash of frustration at that. Why was he being so stupid about this? About her?]

I managed to stop myself. What if I turn again? What if next time it's worse?

I don't care about "what if"s!

( He snaps back, this time, the complex emotions twisting into anger as they usually do with him. He's been better with it lately, but sensitive topics always seem to bring up so much strong emotion that it's suffocating, confusing. He gets upset, and he gets angry. A defense.

He doesn't know how to express his full thoughts here properly. Not yet. )

Then you're a fool!

[It slips out reflexively. Uncontrolled. Sloppy. She realizes, after a moment, that her vision is blurring with tears, that her breathing is harsh and her heartrate is spiking again. She tries to tame it, tries to control the breathing, to restrain the tears, ignore the clenching sensation in the pit of her stomach, but it's like she has no control- her own body betraying her, her emotions betraying her, again, it's infuriating-]

( The tears, combined with the anger... Shealtiel doesn't know how to deal with it. He stays in place, refusing to run like he normally would, but he doesn't have the ability to step forward. It feels like he has no place to. Like he shouldn't.

Something aches in his chest at the sight, but even when he parts his lips, he can't come up with anything to say. )

[There. There it is. What she was waiting for.

Was it fear? Anger? Contempt? She can't even tell. She just knows that look makes everything even worse, makes control slip further from her grasp, and she's supposed to be better than this, she's Azula, why can't she-

"Sooner or later-

No.

they all realize what you are-"

Shut up-

"Then they-"

Shut up shut up shut up shut-]

Well? Say something!

Songerein IC Inbox

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject